I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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