There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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