Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
