..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
