he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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