my mouth tastes like poor choices
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
My vagina just clenched in fear
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
