Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
