she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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