I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
