i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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