Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
