Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Never underestimate the power of titties
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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