I think i peed on brittanys purse
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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