Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
