Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
