I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I just want to make out with him forever
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize