wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
