This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
