I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
