I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
This is my gift to your gina
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
