I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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