"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
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