Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
