if only i could text you this smell
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
