I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
