I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
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