I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
