I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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