my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
