i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
