Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
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