i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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