just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
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