I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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