Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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