Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
