I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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