I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
