The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
