Having a random hookup so left but love u
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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