wake up i wanna do it froggy style
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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