Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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