just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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