The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
