What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
jump out the window naked night went bad
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
