how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize