I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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