then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
