kristin has been a bad kristin
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
