She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Randomize
