i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
